Dexter Doesn’t Have a Chance

*Ahoy! Spoilers ahead**

In Season 8, “Make Your Own Kind of Music,” Dexter and team finally figure out what audiences might have guessed with the random insertion of a hot dude that hasn’t died yet into the cast–Oliver Saxon, Cassie the dead neighbor’s boy toy–is the Brain Surgeon AND Dr. Vogel’s not-dead son. Phew! What a plot twist. So, why am I not impressed?

Saxon gets questioned and his hair still looks amaze balls.
Saxon gets questioned by Bautista and his hair still looks amaze balls.

Because the revelation was A) Too little too late and…no, that’s basically why.

If you’ve been reading these little synopses of Dexter season 8, you’ll know that I am a big fan of the show. I’ve been wondering the end-game for Dexter, as the tie ups have not been obvious. While Vogel’s purpose as a critical plot point leading up to a big finish has finally become clear, I am not as impressed as I thought I would (or should) be. Still, Dexter needs a kill and baby Vogel/Saxon needs to get himself dead, if only for murdering Zach right when he was getting interesting. Unfortunately, Dr. Vogel disagrees. At the end of this episode, we see her blatantly lying to her serial killer in shining armor, telling Dexter she hasn’t seen her son as he is creepily lurking in the shadows. Dexter pleads with his “Spiritual Mother,” but she has made her choice, even if Dex doesn’t know it yet.

Another awkward Hannah/Dexter moment.
Another awkward Hannah/Dexter moment.

Alongside Dexter’s obvious Vogel family problem, he’s got dear, sweet Hannah McKay and the little issue of her having a pretty hefty price on her head for being a murderer and all. Hannah is a no-win situation, even papa Harry knows it, but Dexter is completely oblivious. Again, with the  blind love thing! Dexter and Hannah have created an ideal out–they will take Harrison, the half a million dollars Hannah stashed, and fly to Argentina to live a long, crazy life together. The problem is, Dexter isn’t thinking clearly, he’s running on pure emotion and that usually leads to a death of someone he cares about (see: RITA). So, when Dexter has a master plan that doesn’t involve murdering a bad guy or picking up donuts for the office, I am wary that said plan will work.

Two ganglies don't make a right.
Two ganglies don’t make a right.

In other awkward news, Quinn kissed Deb and made the likelihood of Jamie Bautista living through the next 3 episodes all but vanish. Saxon/baby Vogel already knows where Jamie lives and with whom she colludes. Sorry, hon, it isn’t looking bright for you. Honestly, it isn’t looking too great for Dexter or any of his cohorts. Deb has officially lost the support of her boss, Jamie and Harrison don’t have a police detail outside the house any longer, Vogel is at the mercy of her cray-cray son and Hannah is relying on Dexter to come through with the means to get her out of town. That is a lot of pressure on a serial killer who has barely killed at all this season. Honestly, it seems like the end of the road for Dexter. His decisions are leading him down the wrong path. I love Hannah, but he needs to focus and stop fantasizing about a South American vacay with that woman. Dexter should be killing baby Vogel and maybe mama Vogel just for good measure so that he can get on with his life. But, alas, we all know there are only 3 episodes left of this series and Dexter’s luck seems to be running out. Will he make it to Argentina and live happily ever after or will his sins catch up with him?

**Nope, still not my pics. If they’re yours, let me know and I will bake you some cookies AND give you credit.**