Hold on to your tall undead Viking vampires, True Blood Season 6 has arrived, and our long awaited view of Billith (Bill Compton’s new blood god alter-ego) has not disappointed.
True to form, this season of TB promises lots of blood, lots of nudity, and more plot lines than a George R. R. Martin novel (ok, that’s an exaggeration; nobody outdoes GRRM).
So, six things to ponder as the sixth season of TB progresses **S6E1 spoiler alert**:
1. Who the f**k is Warlow? We already know that he’s Lillith’s progeny, but what does he have to do with Sookie? And what does he want to do with her [insert innuendo here]?
2. Will Jason Stackhouse ever quit being a dumb ass? Just go get your sexy redheaded vampire, fairy boy, and quit being such a ponce. Nobody likes racist douchebags.
3. Who is Rutger Hauer’s character? Now if you’ve read the Charlaine Harris novels (and if you haven’t, look away now), you would know who he is. IMDB names his TB character as “Macklyn Warlow/Niall Brigant.” Well, we know Warlow is evil, but if you’ve read the Harris novels, you’ll know that Niall is Sookie’s fairy great-grandfather. But, since TB has done away with anything resembling the books’ original plots, one can only wonder what they’ll transform this character into.
4. What the f**k is going on with Andy Bellefleur’s super-fast-maturing children? (And, aside from the heart-warming conversation he had with Arlene about his capability of being a good parent, do we really give a shit about his storyline?)
5. Can Eric Northman get any sexier?
Yes, he can. And he will. Protective Eric is just what I want to see with Sookie. Forget Bill, forget the werewolf, THIS is the perfect balance of “awww that’s adorable” and “dear god they smolder with unspoken lust.”
#teameric because I like my vampires tall, blond, and Viking.
6. Will Bill Compton finally be interesting? My answer? Probably, because if last night’s episode is any indication, he’s not 100% Bill anymore. He’s got Lillith living in him now, and maybe he’ll finally realize that he’s got the potential to be a BAMF because he’s a goddamned vampire. Maybe he’ll finally stop being compared to Edward “Tinkerbell” Cullen.
So…only six days until the next episode. How will HBO brain-fuck us this year?
- 15 OMG Moments In The “True Blood” Premiere (entertainably.com)
- True Blood Season 6, Ep. 1 review: “Who Are You, Really?” (tor.com)
- True Blood – Bloody Sunday (televisionwithoutpity.com)